living like jesus.

Does your head every just get clouded with all the things you've allowed yourself to be exposed to? All the media, movies, worldliness? All caught up in the lies that are thrown at 20 something's?

Mine does. And is right now really.

Lately I've realized that people are bad. Not trustworthy. Me included. We are not inherently good. We do not desire righteousness on our own, neither can we possibly attain it on our own. Not one is righteous. No not one. When we are saved, our souls are made righteous. God sees the righteousness of Jesus instead of our sin, stamped on us like a seal. But, we still are stuck in sinful bodies, and live in a sinful world. We still need God to make our thoughts and actions good: daily.

The problem I see in my generation is that it seems like nobody is depending on Jesus to make us good anymore. We are just living our lives day by day, some of us in total ignorance of our own filth. Kind of just floating through life, seeking a good time. Doing what we want. Trusting that our decision for salvation at age 5 will carry us into eternity.

Whether that decision alone with no visible lifestyle change will carry you into eternity is for all of those theologians to answer who have been arguing the issue for thousands of years. I myself don't know that answer. But let me say something that I do know: the powers of darkness are present. And there's a reason we are supposed to arm ourselves with the full armor of God. Because spiritual life is a battle. Especially in the world we are living in, which all the crap that is constantly being thrown at us. And it is in our nature to desire sin.

What I am re-discovering lately, is that Jesus desires more from us than just a salvation decision. He wants to change us to be more like him, which requires surrender of our own wills on our part. He wants us not only to die and be resurrected with him in our salvation decision, but wants us to die to ourselves daily and live by his Spirit daily. To resist the temptations of a temporary good time and to live more like Jesus lived. I just read this Max Lucado book, Just like Jesus, which was inspiring and incredibly God appointed that I read this book right now, struggling with what I am struggling with.

Max asks the question, what if Jesus was to take over your life right now? What if Jesus woke up in place of you and lived your life and went to your classes and talked to your friends and lived your life for a day? What would this look like? This question kind of blew my mind. Because I realized how much I live for myself on a daily basis. My life would look drastically different if Jesus was living my life for me.

The main two things that stuck out to me in Max's book are attributes of Jesus that are seriously lacking in my life: his constant communion with the father and his love and compassion for others.

One thing I like about Jesus is he was always going off to be alone and talk to the Father. He was always leaving the disciples and going off to pray. But not only that, he was constantly in fellowship with God. He went where the Father told him to go and said what the Father spoke through him. He did nothing without the Father. This is because he was connected with God every minute of every day. In Max Lucado's book he talks about this man Frank Laubach who decided he wanted to try an experiment. He wanted to see if it was possible to be in constant communication with God... Like all day, everyday. Not just compartmentalize his spiritual life from the rest of his life, but allowing his spiritual life to define every moment and every thought. Always praying and thinking Godly thoughts, tapping into God’s will etc... like Jesus did. Anyways, it was a struggle for him at first, but he ends up doing it... At least he did his best and had a couple successful days. He lived in constant surrender to God: consciously yielding every thought and word and action to him and living in his presence. And he said that life was calm for him, that he looked at people with genuine love and perceived situations completely differently... More positively. And that God became his intimate friend.

One thing I've personally struggled with is knowing the will of God for my life... A.k.a the future. I think the sermon on the mount applies here, when Jesus basically says, don't worry about tomorrow. Seek first the kingdom. When we are in tune with God, we do his will. When we, the vines, are connected to the branch, we don't have to constantly worry about what the branch wants, because we are one with the branch.

 So I'm thinking, if Jesus and Frank can do this whole constant communication with God thing, then I can. I think the only way I can though, is because the Holy Spirit is probing me anyways; it's just a matter of choosing to surrender by making conscious effort. And praying... constantly. Also, I think that what the Bible says in Romans 12 applies when it talks about transforming and renewing our minds so that what can test what Gods will is. Taking every thought captive and testing it according to the Word of God. If its not godly, discard it. And filling my mind with things of God instead. Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. Jesus only ever did what was beneficial. That's how I want to live.

Another thing I like about Jesus is that He saw people. He really saw them, and he really cared. Not only did he see people, but he saw the absolute worst parts of people. He could read their minds... and he knew all about their secret thoughts and their future betrayals and sins. Like, his disciples for example. He knew that Peter was going to deny him and that Judas was going to betray him. And that every disciple would desert him when he got arrested. But he still spent all of his time with them and he still washed their feet. He washed their feet. He served the people who he knew would hurt him and abandon him. He knew their dirtiest thoughts and deeds and didn't treat them judgmentally, but loved them and served them in the most humble way possible.

For some reason, even with all of the crap that Jesus knew about people, and even with all the betrayal and abandonment, He still loved and forgave. He saw people as precious and worthy of love and affection. He had compassion on those who hurt him. He sought to save the lost. He washed the feet of those who sinned against him. He also never tired of dealing with people. He talked to people all day and healed people left and right.

I think my problem is that I grow bitter towards people who hurt me. I avoid those people. Or I unconsciously analyze them, trying to figure them out, and then kind of label them. Its easy, when we've been hurt a lot, to stop trusting people and to close ourselves off. And to think "all people are jerks and that nobody even loves Jesus anymore" (my current struggle). That's probably a pretty natural (sinful) reaction. But.... What if Jesus loved me that way? What if Jesus didn't show love towards me whenever I sinned against him... which is pretty much all the time?

God wants us to love people like Jesus loved them... The way he loves us. God calls us to view people as precious. To treat them with kindness. And to serve. To never tire of people and never tire of showing compassion.

When we view people like that, when we really love them, it shows. It shows on our faces. We radiate love and goodness.  People flock to us. That's what they did to Jesus anyways.

Conclusion: I am bad. I am only made good because of what Jesus did on the cross, and because of His Holy Spirit living within me. I'm going to try to be more like Jesus and live in alliance with the Holy Spirit, because this is the will of God for me. I will consciously try to be in communion with God throughout the day and stay connected to the branch. That will be a struggle, but worth it. I will try to change my perception about people. Try to love people the way Jesus loves me. But I think staying connected to the branch is primary. The rest comes with the package.